Thinking of doing a joint wedding speech? Read Speechy's top tips

'The Speech Surgery' with Heidi Ellert McDermott, founder of Speechy & author of The Modern Couple's Guide to Wedding Speeches

black and white photo of guests raising a toast at a wedding reception Credit: Thomas William on Unsplash

My fiancé and I were thinking about doing a joint wedding speech but we've no idea where to start. Any advice?

Do it. Your guests will love it! A joint speech is a really modern addition to any wedding, and your friends and family will love it as they get to hear from you both!

A joint speech follows the same etiquette principles as your standard bride and groom speech but allows you to present it as a team and play up to your relationship dynamic. But, despite the two voices, be careful not to make the speech double the length! No more than 1,500 words maximum. When it comes to writing a joint speech, it all comes down to your ability to collaborate, discuss and bounce ideas off each other. You must resist the urge to shake your head despairingly or bang your head off the table, when your partner suggests something you don't like.

Instead, you need cultivate a creative environment. Organise a date night and brainstorm...

  • Who you want to thank
  • If you need to pay a tribute to any absent friends or family members
  • The stories you could tell to entertain everyone and give them an insight into your relationship
Once you've gathered good content and ticked off all the speech to-dos, pick out the best bits and you're ready to write a first draft. I suggest one of you does the first pass of the speech, and then the other reads through and suggests edits. This means you don't have to debate words as you go, but it also requires that you're both open to feedback.

A joint speech structure is similar to an individual newlywed speech...
  • Hello, welcome & some early humour
  • The Speech-Meat – Where you tell a few great stories and show your relationship in action
  • Thank yous
  • Acknowledgement of the dearly departed (if necessary)
  • A final more romantic tribute to each other
  • A toast
Divide the speech so you each have small sections to deliver (2 – 6 sentences) and alternate throughout. You want to support each other's narrative.

We encourage couples to discuss every element of their speech, apart from the final romantic tribute to each other. With that, just agree the length – (50 to 75 words?) – and who's going first etc.  Deliver your lines as a surprise on the day, before uniting to deliver the final toast. 

Another benefit of opting for a joint speech is that you can rehearse (the majority of) it together. As well as ensuring the words are ingrained in your head, you should also practise your 'double-act'. You need to interact throughout, so also rehearse what you're doing as your partner delivers their lines. Don't just look at your speech notes, make sure you're actively listening and reacting to what they say. Look at who they're thanking, roll your eyes at any teasing, laugh along to the jokes. On the day, simply look like you're having fun with your favourite person in the world and the guests will pick up on the oxytocin-vibes!

For more inspiration www.speechy.com/speechy-advice/couples-joint-speech

Missed our first Speechy series of columns, find more here.

You may also be interested in

Bye Bye Sweet Caroline: The Classic Anthems BANNED From UK Weddings

Bye Bye Sweet Caroline: The Classic Anthems BANNED From UK Weddings

The era of the predictable wedding singalong is officially dead, according to new data from entertainment agency Jonny Ross Music. New figures have revealed that Britain's couples are ruthlessly blacklisting the nation's favourite party anthems from their big days. A shocking analysis of playlist requests shows that legendary floor-fillers are being banished to the 'Do Not Play' list. Modern couples are ordering DJs to completely snub overplayed staples like 'Uptown Funk' and 'Mr Brightside'. But Brits are not turning their backs on the dancefloor. Instead of relying on default reception cheese, millennial newlyweds are demanding authentic club vibes that replicate a proper night out.

READ ARTICLE

The British Wedding Tradition Most Guests Never Question

The British Wedding Tradition Most Guests Never Question

Most wedding guests have heard the phrase "wedding breakfast", but very few stop to question it. After all, the meal is rarely served in the morning. It usually comes after the ceremony, often in the afternoon, and can involve anything from a formal three-course dinner to sharing boards, canapes, grazing tables and dessert stations. So why do we still call it a breakfast? According to Nick from Country House Weddings, the answer goes back centuries and is tied to religion, fasting and the way weddings were once celebrated in Britain. Breaking A Very Specific Fast The word "breakfast" does not originally mean a morning meal. It simply means breaking a fast.

READ ARTICLE

Yankee Candle - quick on sale now!

Yankee Candle - quick on sale now!

If you're looking for thoughtful gifts for your bridal party or stylish wedding favours, now is the perfect time to shop. A selection of Yankee Candle fragrances is currently available at 30% off on Amazon until 10 July. The discounted range includes romantic favourites such as Wedding Day, alongside fresh summer scents including Cherry Blossom, Sage & Citrus, Tangerine & Vanilla, Red Raspberry, Fluffy Towels and Lavender Vanilla. Those planning autumn or winter weddings can also stock up on seasonal fragrances including Warm Cashmere, Autumn Wreath, Christmas Cookie, Snow in Love and Mistletoe.

READ ARTICLE

ALDI reveals scent-sational summer home fragrances

ALDI reveals scent-sational summer home fragrances

Looking to add a touch of luxury to your home (or wedding this summer) without the designer price tag? Aldi has unveiled its latest Hotel Collection home fragrance range, with prices starting from just £3.99. Available in stores from June, the collection sees the return of customer favourites including the Premium Hotel Collection candles in Bergamot & Vanilla, alongside new summer-inspired scents such as Waffle Cone Sundae, Tropical Hibiscus, Lemon and Neroli and Sea Salt & White Sails. The range also includes reed diffusers and classic fragrances such as Cardinal Red, Liquid Luxe and Intense Passion, allowing shoppers to layer scent throughout the home.

READ ARTICLE

Subscribe to Your Devon & Cornwall Wedding Magazine for free

VISIT SITE

Follow Your Devon & Cornwall Wedding Magazine on Instagram

VISIT SITE

Submit your wedding to be featured in Your Devon & Cornwall Wedding Magazine

VISIT SITE

Follow Your Devon & Cornwall Wedding Magazine on Facebook

VISIT SITE